What you're already doing right

Part of what I am learning through having chronic health issues is a greater sense of self-love, gentleness and compassion for myself, and getting in touch with an inherent sense of worthiness. Rather than understanding my worth as contingent on my productivity level, my perceived likeability, my career, or my health.

I think it’s easy for people with health issues to feel like they are constantly failing. Much of this is due to “illness shaming,” or the spiritual belief that your illness is always caused by some sort of emotional or spiritual issue that you have failed to resolve. While I believe the emotional / spiritual component of health can indeed be an important factor for many, including myself, it’s not always the whole story. Sure, illness can be a profound opportunity to transform. Inner work may or may not heal you, but hopefully you’ll be happier regardless and THATS the goal. I want to get away from the belief that something is wrong with you if you are sick. You are NOT a failure if you keep having health issues. There really are physical issues that require physical solutions that have nothing to do with your emotional health. Genetic disorders. Conditions brought on by environmental toxins. Etc. And dear lord, even the most enlightened have gotten sick! So please, let’s stop that. And even if you have healed yourself physically by healing emotionally (which is great!), this might not be so cut and dry for the next person. Sometimes there are both physical and emotional issues. Sometimes one or the other. You can’t know what another person’s journey is. That’s up to them and their own spiritual journey.

If you know someone struggling with health issues, I think it’s fine to offer resources, especially if they are searching for solutions, but don’t immediately jump on them to tell them what you think they are doing wrong. They probably need to hear what they are doing right. Tell them as often as you can that they are doing AMAZING work. They are keeping afloat during an extremely difficult and ongoing issue. Their lives have probably changed into something they barely recognize. They are often uncomfortable physically. And still, they fight for their health and sometimes their survival. They are learning to love and prioritize themselves and shift their lives in ways that feel new and scary. Thank them for living, for being in your life, for adding joy, inspiration and beauty into to the world. Say you’re proud of them. For their strength and vulnerability. For their hope and their determination. For their love for living as full of a life as they can despite their limitations. For their big hearts and brave spirits. For feeling their feelings. For prioritizing themselves and learning to love themselves more deeply than ever before. For their wisdom, kindness, and passion.

For the sick (hell, for anyone)… Even if you aren’t doing everything “right,” even if you are not “productive enough” or “nice enough,” you’re still always wonderful and worthy. You are doing amazing things, and if everyone knew the magnitude of the strength and wisdom with which you move through your life, they would be in awe. You will always be enough, no matter what. 💜